Thank you,sir, may I have another?

Quite a bit has happened since my last post. My work, relying on my previous doctor's note as the word of Christ, gave me a few options-all of which had me in a panic. I could either return to full duty and keep my hours, work only the second half of my regular shifts, or take more time off siting medical leave. I investigated my options, and, despite my supervisor's initial email to the contrary, was able to add my two cents and come up with a temporary workable situation. I have 2/3 of my hours for the next three weeks. I think this will be enough to squeak by on in the short term. At first I couldn't see how this would work out. Full duty was going to be really tough with more expansions to go. I could BS my way through, but what if I dropped a baby or something? What if me pushing myself too hard meant harm to someone I was responsible for? I'm not very good at acknowledging my limits-and this one was a hard one to swallow. Half time wasn't going to cover my bills-even with Joseph's help on rent and whatnot. I looked into our state's unemployment/temp disability laws, and it seems like they aren't very accommodating. Luckily one of the nights I'm working entails me presenting on various topics to the residents, and it's a task that would be difficult for another staff to fill in on. After this week (Wed being the second to last fill!), I realized that the hours being cut were actually rather helpful. This shit is an ordeal, and I need my rest.

Joseph's Birthday is today! What a guy I've got. I feel so lucky to have him. He really takes great care of me without making me feel like a fucking invalid. He's sensitive to my needs, and rolls with the punches as well as anyone could. I was afraid to admit I ever wanted so much from another human because I though it was simply too much to ask. But here he is...

I have a pretty awesome medical update. My current doctor does things a bit differently than other surgeons I've read about. I have heard his reasoning as well as the logic behind other surgeon's methods, and they both make sense to me. My doctor's strategy sounds like the preferred plan since it shortens the length of my reconstruction and...well...shortens the length of my reconstruction:) The plan now is to have one more expansion in a week and a half (Feb 3) which will put me at 550cc, then wait three weeks and have the exchange surgery. Dr. Hardy has explained that he would like to carve out a little more tissue by the sternum in order to give a bit more cleavage, and thinks he can get 750cc implants in. In effect the final expansion will be done with the permanent implants. This sounds good to me as I hear the implants are much more comfortable than the expanders. I like the idea of having the final steps combined into one last procedure, then starting to feel better and better without the setbacks that expansions result in. We'll see how it goes. I think with proper pain management and being at the hospital that I want to be at (close to home!!!), I'll do well. Thank goodness there's an end in sight. I'm tiring of this ordeal. I can make it, but I'm tired.

Can you expand on that?

This is my first full week back at work. Unfortunately it coincided with my first in town expansion. I had to go through some rigmarole to get an appointment, so I jumped on the first one they offered-Wednesday morning at 7:30 am. I had the day to relax, and went to work at 6pm to pull the first of three all-nighters. The down side was that the 50ccs of extra saline in each side made quite a stink under my muscle. My expanders are at 450ccs each now, which is technically full capacity. This doctor and my Seattle surgeon have differing views on how much overfill one can achieve with a given expander. The local doc thinks filling a 450cc expander to 850cc (as I had been told would be needed to achieve a D cup) will only result in me having a rock hard ball under my pectoralis. This, as you may expect, would be incredibly uncomfortable and probably a bit counter productive.

The Seattle plastics surgeon was rather flippant about most questions I had and never gave me much in the way of specific answers. That combined with the fact that I never saw him after the initial consult, and don't even know if he actually performed the second half of my procedure with his own hands, leaves me devoid of loyalty or confidence. The Seattle surgeon from the SCCA who removed the breast tissue was the reason I made the trip, and the plastics doc was more of an afterthought. Though the local plastics doc doesn't promise a return to my original size, he offers several other benefits which have resulted in my decision to have him see me through the remainder of my expansion and on through my exchange surgery.

He has great credentials and a very good bedside manner. There was no excessive poking.

He gave logical, clear explanations and answered all of my questions to my satisfaction.

Having the last surgery locally will be more convenient and less expensive. I trust the hospital staff here to take better care of me post op than did the nursing staff at UW. Joseph will be able to keep up with school and care for me simultaneously. My friends will be able to visit and help out.

I feel confident that I will wake up from surgery with the results I'm told I can expect. Of course there is always a bit of uncertainty with a procedure like this, but I think any changes would be because of a medical necessity rather than an error.

I like the idea that the money stays in the community.

Scheduling will be easier now that I'm "in."

So...
I have two more expansions scheduled, and then I could be ready for the exchange surgery. It's nice to think that this all could be done sooner than I thought, and without a long trip to Seattle and back. Hopefully I can come out of this with a nice set of C cups and the promise of someday sleeping on my side again...